By Carol Church, Writer, Family Album
Reviewed by Suzanna Smith, PhD, Department of Family, Youth, and Community Sciences, University of Florida
“He pushed me!”
“She started it!”
“He won’t let me play!”
“MOM!”
For any parent with more than one child, this back-and-forth probably sounds all too familiar. Although sibling conflict seems to be universal, it can certainly create stress. And many parents feel genuinely worried when the children they love really don’t seem to be getting along.
Parents often assume that reducing fighting is the key to improving sibling relationships. However, a new study in the journal Child Development Perspectives offers a somewhat different viewpoint. After examining many articles about sibling relationships, the author suggests that while reducing conflict can be helpful, recognizing and promoting positive sibling behaviors is also key.
Based on an analysis of current research, the author offers a list of ways to help build sibling relationships. First, make an effort to find ways for siblings to play together in age-appropriate ways they all enjoy. Fantasy play seems to be especially important in building bonds between children. Second, when siblings do support, cooperate, and protect each other, recognize and praise this behavior. Finally, make sure to emphasize and protect the special sibling bonds and solidarity that come from living together and knowing each other so well.
Research shows that good sibling relationships can help children and teens through difficult family experiences, and are also related to happiness and well-being in adulthood. Nurturing the sibling bond in childhood can provide a lifetime of benefits.
(Image credit: UF/IFAS file photo.)
References:
Gass, K., Jenkins, J., & Dunn, J. (2007). Are sibling relationships protective? A longitudinal study. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 48(2), 167–175. doi: 10.1111/j.1469-7610.2006.01699.x
Kramer, L. (2010). The essential ingredients of successful sibling relationships: An emerging framework for advancing theory and practice. Child Development Perspectives, 4(2), 80–86. doi: 10.1111/j.1750-8606.2010.00122.x
(Originally published in a slightly different form as: Church, C. (2010). The importance of positive sibling relationships. [Radio broadcast episode]. Family Album Radio. Gainesville, FL: University of Florida.)
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