Fighting About Money with Your Spouse: Risky Business?

By Suzanna Smith, PhD, Department of Family, Youth, and Community Sciences, University of Florida

Reviewed by Michael Gutter, PhD, Department of Family, Youth, and Community Sciences, University of Florida

If you ask couples what causes the most disagreements in their relationship, money is likely to come up for many. It seems that when two people must decide together how to allocate funds and spend hard-earned money, conflict often follows.

A study in the journal Family Relations used national survey data on married couples to find out whether couples were more likely to end their relationship when they frequently disagreed about finances. Researchers compared couples at two points in time and found that couples were more likely to divorce when they often disagreed about finances earlier in their relationship.

Arguing about money turned out to be the number one predictor of divorce–more predictive than any other common cause of friction, including household chores, sex, in-laws, and how to spend time together. Unfortunately, frequent arguments about finances seemed to wear away at couples’ marital happiness, placing them at greater risk of splitting up.

But the study also found that how couples handled conflict was pivotal in whether or not they divorced. Frequent, heated arguments were more likely to result in divorce than calm discussions and irregular disagreements.

This study concludes that effective communication can help couples work through money conflicts and have more stable and happy marriages. A financial counselor or relationship counselor can help couples look at their differences and resolve conflicts in ways that help their marriage, which could lower the chances they will divorce.

(Image credit: le mariage prends l’eau by weelakeo. CC license.)

References:

Dew, J., Britt, S., & Huston, S. (2012). Examining the relationship between financial issues and divorce. Family Relations 61, 628-615. DOI:10.1111/j.1741-3729.2012.00715.x

Huffington Post. (July 12, 2013). Divorce study: financial arguments early in relationship may predict divorce. Retrieved from http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/12/divorce-study_n_3587811.html.

(Originally published in a slightly different form as: Smith, S. (2013). Financial disagreements and divorce. [Radio broadcast episode]. Family Album Radio. Gainesville, FL: University of Florida.)